Clive Mutame Siachiyako
Bullying happens in many sections of society. Some people are bullied at work, school, social club or home. Bullying can be tormenting. Some bullied persons become suicidal or abusers of others in future. The imprint of bullying leaves huge scars in their lives that they fail to erase. It disorients them and robs them of their good life.
Bullying is defined in many ways. Some people call it a deliberate misuse of power through repeated verbal or physical behaviour that causes physical, social or psychological harm. It can be done by an individual or a group misusing their power (e.g. political cadres, prefects in school, police officers, etc.). In the digital era, bullying happens online as well. It can be overtly or covertly (in a subtle way) done to anyone the bully intends to get it.
In boarding school, bullying is like a ritual to welcome others into school. St. Mark's Secondary School was well known for bullying years back. I went there in 1998. We found Obby (pseudonym). He was huge, rude and tall. He was chief bully. No one could stand him. He was feared. He was merciless.
The first week I arrived at school, he rounded us (Grade 8s) and told us to give him whatever we had to our name. He got from us money, biscuits, sweets, roasted chickens, anything. He came to every dormitory and commanded G8s to line up and open their lockers so that he could get whatever he wanted. It was non-negotiable. We had to oblige or risk getting the worst beating in our lives. Just by looking at him, no one could dare refusing. I was tiny and new, I didn’t know how to get around such challenges. I obliged just like any other “Kwiyo” as G8s were called.
Our nightmare had just started. The same week, we were taken to the river next to the school. St. Mark’s is near a beautiful Kawiya river, which could have attracted the missionaries to construct the school in that bush. The river is perforated by umbrella like trees that provide good shed for insects and any other living because. Its vegetation provided good hideouts for weed smoking pupils. It was our turn to taste the marijuana of the area. We queued up and made to smoke the weed. We were not allowed to puff the smoke out. We were not to tell anyone or face the wrath of Obby. That day we bathed with clothes, ate nshima with salt, laughed endlessly, walked to classes for evening studies barefooted, etc. misdeeds due to the weed effects.
It didn’t end at Obby. A teacher joined in the bullying, he lied that he was the only teacher of English (it is the correct way of saying it, right?). We had to pay him to be learning English or never to learn the subject in our lives. There was no specific amount to pay him. Each one paid him according to how much he had. We paid him even for useless books that were not even in the syllabus. He laughed at us for anything he wanted to mock us on e.g. hairstyle, shoes, size of eyes, height, complexion, etc.
Then we had to wash pigs to remove the urbanite/town mentality in us and to welcome us to real life. Being a Grade 8 was tough. Some of the Grade 8s were taken to wash pigs for not giving Obby anything. The pigs were huge and scary. We were made to wash them to sparkling clean. Workers at the production unit had Christmas as we did their work.
The Cadet Force engineered bullying was another nightmare. Cadet Force members woke us up in the mid of nights for the joy ride of it. Whether one liked it or not, we went for running (chilailai). We were told we were prepared to be solders (kaya where that came from). Some Cadet Force members were often clad in military uniform to satisfy their ego. They really made the military dream so real.
Most of the members never got closer to any military camp nor anything in life. They spent their time smoking marijuana and failed Grade 12. Without good school certificate results, it became hard for them to find footing in society.
The systems in the school failed to end bullying. Somehow, bullying that time seemed permissible. We had nowhere to get help. Some pupils (they called weak soldiers) left St. Mark's within a single term. Some of our friends who had money paid their way to get away with it (paying bully leaders. It was survival of the fittest. Each one had to find a way of fitting into the system.
Survival of the fittest was the rule of the game. We had to apply many strategies to survive. These included be-friending bullies. However, be-friending any of the bullies came at cost. We had to sustain their lives. We had to give them money, buy them favorable fritters (known as Jogintos) and other goodies for safety. Whenever we ran out of money we called home begging for more money. It was such a complicated stay.
Joining them was another strategy to survive. This could mean being a spy for bullies, joining the karate club or sports. Alternatively, joining the Cadet Force or the notorious groups in the school such weed smokers become a safety vault. We just had to do something or get chocked by bullies. Some Grade 8s tried faking sickness, it never worked. Some bullies bruised them before they could explain their situation. Weakling had no room at St. Mark’s.
Our all-powerful head teacher did nothing much. He was a nonsense man. But he did little to help the situation. Kaya maybe it was believed that without bullying we remained 'babies' and weak soldiers even when we were not a military barrack. It was hard to get by. But all of us had to find a surviving strategy no matter how temporary or useless it was.
Side effects of our lived-experience of bullying were many. Some boys became ruffians. They looked forward to revenge when new Grade 8s came. They became rebellious and trouble makers. Other bullied boys lost self-esteem and became disoriented. Substance abuse (weed) was rife as a coping measure. The weed influence gave us “dark courage” to cope with the situation. What a life it was!!
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